i love isaac for...

i feel like lately all i've been doing is complaining about isaac. and honestly he is a difficult little guy buti also love him. and i thought i'd tell you why. the way his face lights up when he smiles, it scrunches up and looks just like a ball of cute chub. the way he kicks his feet in excitement when he eats something he loves. the way he sings with us when we're singing him to sleep. the way he thrashes with excitement when he sees me in the morning or after a nap. the way he starts chewing on his hands right before he starts laughing at something. the way he burrows into my shoulder when he's being bashful. how he's starting to notice and love ray ray. the excitement he shows when david gets home from work. the way he is discovering everything from his feet to shadows. that he's beginning to learn his name and turns his head sometimes when we say it. how he smiles at grandma and grandpa on skype. how he puts his all into everything he does. how he's mine. so despite my complaints that make it sound like i don't want to be a mom anymore (which is true somedays) i love my isaac and i wouldn't trade him!

Thanksgiving

I'm most thankful for these two guys! They are just the best. They make me smile every day. David is the best husband i could ask for.

And I'm thankful for this healthy little guy. He's 5 months old today. He makes me smile and laugh every day. I do just about anything to make him giggle. Those laughs are just the best things in the world! He is getting super animated and is learning and growing so much. I'm very thankful that I'm his mother. He is helping me grow into a better person.

Just a few days ago he rolled over for the first time and then a few minutes later he did it again and now he hasn't done it since. Oh well. He would much rather try to crawl than roll. He can get his little knees under his body and his body a couple inches off the ground but he's just not strong enough yet. I'm sure once he is I won't be able to keep up with him.

He has started to notice everything. He watches ray ray. He loves David. He knows the sound of the garage door means that David is home from work. He won't take a nap around when David gets home and if David returns and doesn't go right to see Isaac then Isaac will start throwing a fit. He's quite and opinionated little guy. He has gotten very good at eating and loves solid foods.

Likes:

Baths

Being tickled, his knees and armpits are the best spots

Daddy

Ray Ray

Trying to crawl

Listening to me sing

Dislikes:

Not being able to do what he wants to do

Being left alone

Strangers; sadly stranger danger has kicked in. I mean it's good but now he won't let anyone hold him at church.

Committed

This past Sunday I was sitting in church looking around at the other babies in the room. A baby a few weeks younger than Isaac was playing happily and quietly. Another a week older than Isaac was doing the same. Another baby a couple months younger than Isaac was sleeping and startled herself then settled effortlessly back to sleep in her mom's arms. I couldn't help but be a bit jealous for a few moments. I thought "why is my baby the only one who can't be quiet in church, take an effortless nap or play peacefully so I can listen to a lesson rather than walking the halls?" After wallowing for a moment in the "whys" and "what ifs" I looked over at my sweet, wonderful little boy and wished for no one but him.

Later that night, as David and I were laying in bed talking, I told him about that moment in church. He made the statement that Isaac commits 110% to whatever he does. When he hates something he really hates it. That means that when he is cranky he's super cranky, when he's playing he's into it completely and doesn't care that he's being loud. On the other hand, when he loves something he really loves it. When he is happy he is over the moon. He squeals and giggles and smiles so big it takes over his whole face. He wants everyone around him to know and feel what he feels. And that infectiousness makes him who he is. He is not mediocre about anything.

Although Isaac is not an easy baby I wouldn't trade him for any other baby no matter how easy they may be. Isaac wouldn't be who he is if he wasn't as animated and committed to life as he is. He wouldn't be the little boy I've grown to love more than anything. I have the sweetest little boy and I wouldn't change a thing about him for anything.

I was so glad that David told me that. It hasn't necessarily made Isaac an easier baby but it has changed how I view his actions and reactions. It has made it just a little easier to deal with his intense emotions. It has helped me understand and know him more and the more I know him the more I love him. I have an amazing boy! Although his temperament is difficult for me now I think it will help him have the persistence to do what he decides to do and be what he wants to be no matter what it is. Hopefully he will make good decisions and choose good goals to attain and become an even more amazing person than he already is.

Yesterday I read this talk from General Conference and it just helped me recommit to be a fantastic mom. Favorite quote from it is the first line that says, "As we look into the eyes of a child, we see a fellow son or daughter of God who stood with us in the premortal life." How true and how profound! I'm raising not only my child but a child of God. He's trusted me to raise this little boy, to know him and help him be the best he can be. I'll do my best.