I am the fountain of all knowledge...

Or at least that's what many of the faculty in my department presume me to be.

I'm having a hard time not getting frustrated with a couple people that either expect me to know everything or do everything for them.

Example A: I have been asked this question multiple times and the answer is always the same. "So have they figured out what's up with my teaching for the fall." My answer. "Nope, I'll let you know when they do." This is followed by the same question the next week. I occasionally add that they (the powers that be) are discussing the options. that of course is followed up with the question of what they are discussing. Well i don't know and if you are that interested you may feel free to join the discussion with them. response to that: no i just hope they're not thinking of anything too crazy. isn't this why you would want to be involved in the discussion about your future? Whatever.

Example B (my personal favorite): I've been scheduling some rooms for a conference/symposium that this professor is heading up. Well he comes and tells me last week that the numbers have doubled, making the rooms that we have impossible to hold everyone. I tell him that it might not be possible to find anything large enough but I'll see what i can find out. His response: well it better be possible. My thought: Oh yes master I'll pull that one out of thin air for you. What am i, your genie? So i go about finding out if we can get rooms that are large enough. I get an email back explaining the options we have. Since I'm not in charge of the conference and do not feel qualified to make the final decision on the room i forward the email to the professor asking him to look over the options and to let me know what he has chosen. A week passes. I send a friendly but firm reminder email asking him to figure it out ASAP or he will not have rooms for his conference. The next day he stops by my desk to ask me if I've figured out what to do. I curtly informed him that i had sent him two emails and that he would have to look over the options and then let me know and then i would make the changes. He said: oh you emailed me? My thoughts: Yeah hello! You know email, that thing that everyone uses to contact you about important things. Please don't disregard an email sent by me. I promise it is not a ridiculous forward or junk. I would never email you expect for work related business. Seriously! Well it's been a couple of days since then and still no word. I have the feeling that he will forget to look at the email and i will not make changes (because it's not my place to do so and it's the principal of the thing) and he will show up for the conference and there will not be enough room. Of course he will come fuming to me and anyone else that will listen about how I've ruined everything. To which i will hand him the copies of the emails i sent him which i have already printed to safeguard me in this exact situation. Still it won't be fun but it will be better having the proof. yes i have learned from past similar experiences. and yes i will be sending out one more email telling him very clearly that if he does not decide i will not make changes and he will not have rooms. My work needs a little tough love.

Example C (this is just for giggles): Same professor from example a came up to me today and asked me for a Kleenex. i offered her a box to keep in her office since we do that here. She declined and just took one. Somehow i think this scenario will be played out again.

So yes i am the fountain of all knowledge. One who knows all, has all, and does all for whoever is asking.