This is what I do all day long. If you ever need me I'll be on the couch. My phone is near by feel free to call. If you'd like my house to be clean too bad. Me to be showered, not likely. Anything productive going on, not so much.
Just a question for all the mom's out there. How can I help train my 5 week old to sleep on his own? He does fairly well at night, sleeps probably 5 or 6 hours on his own, makes it back to sleep after the first feeding but wants to be held after the second one. During the day it's not an option. If i set him down anywhere, crib, chair, upstairs, downstairs he wakes up within 15 minutes. So i hold him literally all day long. I've gotten very talented at doing a few things one handed (going to the bathroom, making lunch etc.) Most of the day I'm stuck on the couch because my arms and back hurt less when i do that. I had been strapping him into the baby carrier and getting a few more things done but last week he started getting heat rash and doesn't like that anymore. I know i can't really sleep train him for a couple more months at least but that seems like an eternity at the moment and my sanity and emotions are taking a toll. Any tricks, hints, ideas would be greatly appreciated.
If there's really nothing i can do but suck it up then please recommend some good books, as many as you can think of; I manage to go through a book every 2-3 days. Thanks for the help and support!
7 comments:
you've probably already tried this, but white noise saved our life with Thad. You can download apps on your phone, buy machines secondhand, or (as we did) record the sound of your vacuum running on your computer and let it play over and over again. It was the absolute only way Thad slept for the first 4 or 5 months. When he was old enough for the baby swing, that helped, too, but I'd only recommend that as a last resort. It always made me nervous and I never slept well when he was in the swing.
The only thing I remember about sleep training for newborns I didn't read until Thad was about 6 months old and it sounded ridiculous. Something about picking him up when he cried, then putting him back down again as soon as he was quiet. And doing that over and over again until the kid gives up. That sounded like the worst idea ever for a sleep deprived mom, but maybe it works for some people.
I have a few sleep training books that I swear by...if you want to borrow them I'd be more than happy to let you! I'll be back in town this Friday. Especially if you are doing a lot of reading. 5 weeks is not too early to start some good habits, in fact, that is what is sometimes recommended. It can only get better, right? :)
I may not be the best person to ask but I'll give my 2 cents anyway...
I had a similar problem with Summer where she would fall asleep in my arms but she would wake up within minutes after setting her down. She actually slept well in her swing, so for a while I let her nap there. But she outgrew it so fast that I eventually had to confront the crib, haha.
Basically, I let her cry it out. I would do the naptime routine (cuddle her while singing a lullaby, then set her down and cover her up with a soft blankie) and then check on her every 5 minutes if she was crying. After just a couple of days she got the hang of it. She would still cry when I set her down, but eventually she would fall asleep and stay asleep for long periods of time.
Every baby is different so find whatever method works for you and just be consistent. The first few days of ANY change kinda suck, but it's worth it in the long run. I wish I could be there to give your arms (and lap) a break :)
Well, this isn't what you want to hear, but what you're describing is exactly what Bridget did. Only not a whole 15 minutes would go by. Try 15 seconds. And I was the ONLY one who could hold her. Not daddy, not siblings, unless of course you didn't mind listening to her screaming..
I took up ASCII art while she was an infant and I got sort of famous for it (still get hundreds of hits if you google me) during that time. :) I also did a LOT of TV watching. I read the Clan of the Cave Bear series, they're nice and long. I also read a lot of Dean Koontz books, he's pretty good.
The thing is, your arm and back muscles will get stronger so you'll be able to do a little more without ending up with a backache, plus he'll be able to be left on a blanket for a few moments at a time while you run and do a little bit here and there, but honestly you'll do more sitting than anything else.
But the main thing to remember is that time will pass and eventually you'll look back and realize that you've been able to set him down and get stuff accomplished for several days in a row. You'll have a setback or two, but the good days will begin to outnumber the not-so-good. And after a while when you see that he's become an independent, confident little toddler you'll wonder where your tiny baby went. And even though you'll be grateful that you once again have the freedom to get the kitchen tidied and the laundry caught up, you'll find yourself missing those days when the only time he felt welcome to the world was when he was safe in your arms.
Hang in there, honey. Not all babies need this kind of loving attention, but the Lord sends those that do to the mothers who He knows will give them what they need. And you've done it so very well. I am so proud of you, and even though I have so much sympathy for you, part of me envies you for the relationship you are building with your little son.
I love you.
Susie
hmm... we always did naps in the swing. If that doesn't work, Have you read the hunger games yet? or Harry Potter? I've heard Fablehaven is good but haven't read it.
I'm able to drive again so maybe I'll come up and hold him so you can shower lol...
Get a side to side swing. The one Carolyn used to have RUINED Aidan for the forward/back one. He'd have nothing to do with it.
And when you REALLY need a nap, just put him in his crib and go to a completely different part of the house. I've had to do that a couple of times, and tell myself, you know what, he's safe, even if he's not happy, but I'm gonna kill myself if I don't get some rest, and then took a nap. It was hard at first, but seriously, getting some good rest really helps the situation, even if it doesn't help HIM get rest.
Wish you were closer, I'd take him for a bit!!!
Not a mom, but I highly recommend The Eye of the World or A Game of Thrones. Either of those will lead to a series that is long enough to keep you buried w/ reading material for a while.
I remember carrying Bridget a lot. She had a lot of endurance with that screaming.
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